My curls and I have been through A LOT together. The dry-brushing era. The matted phase. The questionable haircuts. Product overload, then no product at all. Trial, error, and plenty of tears in between. And honestly? I wouldn’t change a single moment of it.
Growing up, it felt like the unspoken rule for curly girls was to straighten your hair - to smooth it, tame it, make it fit in. That used to frustrate me, but for some reason I always liked being different. Plus, my mum had banned straighteners altogether, so it wasn’t even an option!
Curls were labelled “messy,” and even as a child it bothered me how openly people expressed their dislike for my “unruly” hair. On school picture days especially, photographers would always comment that my hair needed “neatening,” or pushed away from my face. I never did it though, I loved my curls and so did my mum! I’d tell them that this is exactly how she would want to see me in my photo, because this is what I look like everyday.
But for so many curly girls, moments like that can be damaging. They send the message that your curls are messy, unprofessional, and would look much better straight - something that still happens far too often.
I think the reason I loved my curls so deeply, even back then, was because they held personality. On the rare occasion I did straighten my hair, I felt strange and actually more self-conscious! That taught me that my curls are truly me being myself. They’re full of character (a little wild at times) but wholly me.
It’s not easy to resist following the crowd by hiding your natural hair just to meet society’s idea of what’s “attractive.” But can we talk about who on earth decided curls aren’t??? They’re unique. They’re beautiful. Even on the frizzy days - the days I once tried so hard to hide - they’re still gorgeous. Whimsical.
One thing that really helped me learn to love my curls was the way I viewed other people with my hair type - I think most curly girls can relate to this.
When you’re walking down the street or out in public, the hair that makes you pause, the one you admire without even realising, is almost always a curly girl. Maybe it’s because we see ourselves in them, or maybe it’s the confidence and care behind those curls, but we notice them. I always catch myself thinking how stunning they look. And that made me hope that maybe, one day, another curly girl - especially one who feels less confident - might see my curls and feel that little spark of encouragement to embrace her own.
And the message I want every curly girl who feels unsure about her hair to hear is this:
Your curls are beautiful. They are not too messy. They are professional. They are “cool”. And you should never listen to ANYONE who tells you otherwise.
